Saturday Life

Saturday on a college campus means...
Very quiet, students are either sleeping or have escaped from the compound, er I mean campus, to the free world.
Homemade breakfasts, omelets to order, homemade biscuits, fresh baked cinnamon rolls. The Vice President of the school has more talents than just teaching.
Homework perhaps, by the end of the day one feels very guilty for not doing a thing. Or there is a smug feeling of having accomplished much while everyone else was relaxing.
Leftovers in the fridge, some things you a very happy to see again. Other things not so much, like a reappearing nightmare.
Fellowship, by evening there is no longer an obligation to do homework and the fun begins. A movie or two, a game of Sardines in the darkened Admin, or a random library game.

Saterday for me today means fresh clean sheets and the hope of finishing my last paper.

52 Days Left in SD

I miss...
Talking with my mom
Smoothies
Home baked bread
Shopping
Sleeping in
Laughing children
My church family
Walks on the farm...never again...

I will miss...
Teachers, constant wisdom surrounding you is so rich.
Friends who can instantly tell something is wrong
Random adventures, you never know what will happen on a college campus
My roommate, how could I have been so blessed to have such amazing girl for a sister this past year?

I hope I won't miss...
Growing in my relationship with God. Very soon I'll be left to study the Bible on my own will. Oh I shudder to think I may neglect it. Certainly not I pray, without application this past months will surely have been in vain. But it was not I who did the work, nor is it I who will finish.

being confident of this very thing, that he who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Jesus Christ:
Phil 1:6

Through the Fog

Looking at the fog covered mountain reminded me of something, my goal. Right now I sometimes feel like I'm living in a state of fog. Only able to know a small portion of what lies ahead. Everything else is simply black and unknown. Being at school has been different, somewhat like I've imagined and yet so very new at the same time.

Life has been very wonderful. At last I have a sister that sleeps on the other side of the room. And even more close by. Giggles and more giggles echo out of the windows late into the night. Friendly teasing make one feel very at home. Teasing may look like its disliked but on the contrary I love it. By the way did you know Ramon Noodles grow in NE? You may harvest beef or chicken.

Jesting isn't the only spirit lifter. When a person who failed their English placement test told me of their 48% score I felt ever so much better.

Feeling good can't always be. Giggles from tiny lips ring in my ears making me wish they were close by. An opportunity to just to talk with my parents is longed for. The bond that only siblings have is longed for. Moments like this make me sad to the point of tears. Then I wonder why.

Why am I here? Eleven hours away from home, possibly missing the holidays because of the awful distance. Other reasons swirl through my brain but I silence them. Right now I live in a haze of fog not knowing what will come with each new day. However I can see the top of the mountain. The triumph of finishing a school year and finishing it in God's strength. I cannot see the way through only a few steps ahead. God does so I will only follow knowing He will take me to the top.

I remember this truth and let it wash away the hurt. My family will always be missed but even they are far God is so near. Just this thought makes me smile as I proceed into another day of very fun and random collage life.

Looking through my Window

For the next 2 weeks I'm staying with my Aunt and Uncle. You shall hear my thoughts more frequently written from the dreamy blue and white sun porch. Seeing as we are approaching a move you will find many thoughts as I reflect on my childhood home. Today is just the start.
I took it in, the very faded worn carpet beneath my feet. An oval mirror framed my face set in the dresser which belonged to the bedroom set once used by my mother in her girlish days. My hat collection hung neatly on the wall waiting for a tea party. A faded nosegay of flowers lay on the dresser. Tagged with a note which read “to Aunt Bethanne from Janel”. Under the dark lashes my eyes took a final glance and then for what might be forever I walked out of my childhood room.

Living in a house with 3 brothers meant I had my own sleeping quarters. So the room with the wide bay widows and the sweeping red carpet came to be mine. Though I hear it was once my brothers. Thankfully there are little after affects of their short stay in my room. However I wouldn’t have minded a roommate. For I’m not one to be alone much.

Little time did I actually spend in my room. For I found it more enjoyable to be around other people. Or was it the fact I just like a cleaner environment? I’m afraid my room was not always in presentable order. Although it got a top to bottom cleaning on Saturday. I recall on one occasion mom was giving a tour of her immaculate house and then she came to my room. I doubt many surfaces were visible. Let’s not mention the articles of certain clothing that were probably lying about. Not easily embarrassed I proudly gave the tour. Refusing the offer given by our guests for some time to spiff up a bit. Now I might be embarrassed by our guest’s impression however I choose to believe they don’t remember.

My lack of cleaning was because of not because I didn’t in enjoy being Cinderella. On the contraire I loved cleaning my room. Especially if my cleaning spree involved rearranging. Having the same order could never do for me. Quite often the bed was moved along with the book shelf, dresser, vanity, rocker, table, and whatever else there was. Yes everything had to be moved. I shudder to think of my house some day. Will my husband ever know where anything is?

I’m not too much of a decorator I’m afraid. Although as the years went by 3 sets of curtains hung in my room. Bears were my decor of choice. No secret was it I liked them and I received many for various occasions. I set them about everywhere loving their warm friendly faces. Recently I discovered my faithful friends setting in my closet. Lovingly I wrapped them up and stored them away for a future time when they will be needed once again.
I won’t you to hear more of my room and so you will… another day!

Adventures Awaiting

Life as I know is changing, unlike some changes which are temporary I know for a fact my life will never ever be the same. I’m leaving, getting kicked out of the house after toiling for years without pay. Just kidding! Packing the bags is my job and my very own idea. With uncertainty I once again I’m taking the next step in life.

After graduating in 08 the next step was certain yet so uncertain. Staying home and most likely working seemed to be a good option. Yet that was only a rough draft and many details were missing. Quickly however the Lord filled in the empty lines of my life. Two days a week and sometimes more I worked as a mother’s helper for a dear family I know. I volunteered at Source of Light ministries on Tuesday’s. An extra blessing was teaching a Release time Bible class to a group of school children every week. Grandma’s care and helping mom filled time. Other opportunities were given adding little bits of experience to my life. I loved going to the Children’s Home best. Cuddling the little babies who had received so little love was a joy. These things lended well to my character yet I knew I couldn’t do them forever. Not in this stage of life anyway. So I find myself now with a very firm plan for the next 4 months of my life.

Cornerstone Bible Institute has been in my mind for several years now. I felt immediately at home in a trip there last March. Lord willing I will be attended there this fall taking primarily Bible classes. Admittedly I must say I’m scared. Leaving my family is not going to be fun. Mom and I are very close especially during the up’s and downs of this past year. Even from a far though I can be assured of my parents prayer and love for me. Baby sitting my nieces and nephews is something I love very much and I’ll miss it but of course there will be Christmas break. Which will happen to bring a very special present by way of the stork. Yes I’m getting another niece or nephew!

My precious girl friends I’ve grown to adore very much will be missed more than I can tell. E-mail a great invention I think will be a great advocate in keeping touch.

Some days I wish I could do something else instead of going to school. Letting God down is what gives me the drive to move ahead. Nothing bad will come from forging into God’s word and seeking knowledge from Above on a deeper level. Hard times may come but is not God faithful to give us grace to persevere? Going to Bible school I’m quite sure is not all study and tears. Laughter and fellowship is something I hope to have the benefit of.

A friend of mine asked me what my goal in life was. I answered simply “to glorify God in everything I do”. And that is why I’m leaving everything I’ve ever known and jumping into something that has not yet explained its details.

This chapter of my life has a prologue. Yet the pages are blank and the very last page holds a secret, only to revealed after it’s filled with words. Adventures are waiting, exciting, scary, and very mysterious. God is by my side so I’m not anxious only thrilled to have Him always with me as I embark on this great venture.

Home is Where the Heart is

Every house that posed a “For Sale” sign I imagined what it would be like to be welcomed into when coming home from collage. Mom and Dad were house hunting the other night. The thought dreaded at one time turned into a rather fun evening.

I’ve known for a long time that the farm where I cherish many memories will soon no longer be my home. Mom and Dad will be entering a new stage of life soon, one that does not include the farm.

Our farm given to us by God flourished under dad’s care. Long ago are the days where I rode the combine watching the wheat stalks disappear. Faintly I can remember the day it was sold signaling the end of crop production for our farm In more recent thoughts I can still remember feeding the hogs and best of all “sorting” hogs. One of my favorite activates but those soon came to an end as well along with the disappearance of plentiful pork products. Now just a few days ago the last load of cattle made their way to market. Never again will I bottle a baby calf something I never thought I would miss. Hay is being put up thus the old John Deere keeps putting a long. Before long it too will be silent. An era started over 20 years ago is coming to a close.

Change is not something I often welcome. Sometimes I wish mom and dad could live here forever. I imagine bringing home a young man to show the farm. Letting my children see the animals. I want to be able to always walk in the prairie grass letting only the gentle wind fill my ears. Yes I am sad to leave the farm yet I can only look forward to the next home with anticipation.

Though I will remain a farm girl at heart I think the town not so bad. Neighbors will be readily available to reach out too. Convenience will be very nice, who wouldn’t want Wal-Mart at their finger tips? Town streets are rather quiet too and provide ample walking space. Even smooth pavement for bike riding. Best of all I know that where ever my parents dwell it will always be home simply because they are there.

Home is not a farm, place, or house. It’s the place that rings with laughter, jokes, tears, and love. People, the one’s you love turn a cold strange house into a loving home. Naturally I will be sad to leave this house I’ve known for 19 years. I will miss it greatly but will not allow the pain of losing something to overtake the joy of a new thing. Home is not leaving and it never will.

Life in June

Life has been anything but normal this month of June. Even from the first day routine of life fell aside to be replaced with sickness, helping, mourning, laughter, and time with family.



Today is blissful, making breakfast for dad and than worshiping the Lord. Coming home to leftovers served on china than enjoying a very good book and a nap in between. I needed this day of quietness to rest. For my life is about take some normalcy but perhaps not in the restful since. I'm going to be a working girl as of Monday. The local grain elevator offered me the same position I had last summer during wheat harvest. Gratefully I accepted, many don't have a job right now. However God gave me a job which fit perfectly into my summer activities. Perfectly it's just a mile up the road allowing extra money to go into my bank account:) I had lots of adventures last summer and perhaps will have new one's this summer. I just might to tell you if you want to hear.



I almost didn't take the job because I was scared. Naively I didn't know many things that I know know about my workplace. Dad gave me just the spur of encouragement I needed. Challenge is what I'm looking forward too. "Being in the world and not of it" will be easier other times than other's. God has put me on this earth for a purpose and I attend to strive to glorify God in everything I do and say.



Pray for me if you think about it.

Hi:)

Does anybody wonder where I've been? Oh I hope so:)

I haven't strayed far from my home yet I've done little of the ordinary. The events from the past 2 weeks are still too raw to even process. I hope to share with you more but all I can say now is three words.

God's grace enough.

Never ever forget that. When you are overwhelmed, filled with grief, full of selfishness, cannot trust; remember it. Don't you dare forget how good and kind our God is ever. For I have great pity for the person who has gone through trials as great as my own without our God. Surly they bore so much needlessly for it was already being carried.

"For in our weaknesses He had made us strong"

Grace Learned on a Tractor

A habit of giving thanks to God for everything is something my mother has helped me firmly establish. Yesterday and particular as I closed my day with prayer I thanked God sounds of thunder had not touched my ears.

You see I was a true farmer's daughter yesterday and helped my dad put up hay. My job was simply to rake. My rows have a curly Q effect while dad's were quite straight as a pin:) I didn't mind at all for secretly I wished to be a true farm girl and drive the John Deere tractor ever since I rode them with my daddy. Much happier would I have been if the tractors front wheels would have remained on the ground instead of raising up to touch the sky. But I suppose tractors and horses behave in the same manor though their power differs in sources. But I digress.

Tractors seem to be rather loud no matter what the model year. Ear proctors never are enough and little else is heard. So while I saw the approaching storm clouds I didn't ear the threatening thunder which surely would have frightened me. For I am not in the least bit fond of storms. The Lord was very good for fear is a very unnecessary thing. Because of the God's grace I was able to keep my sanity and finish raking the field. I parked the tractor with a satisfaction of being an authentic farmer's daughter.

God's grace is learned everywhere even on a John Deere.

Saterday Morning

My nieces are here today, they've been been at our house since yesterday morning. One arrived sick and one fell to the illness while here. Sickness, tiredness, make you want your mother very much. A good substitute it seems when there is no mother is to simply cry . It's not all crying however there is plenty of amusements. Mom sent the girls to put away their cots and sleeping bags. Promptly the girls moved them to the front room where they are hanging out sick or not. Thankfully they were persuaded to enjoy of the cool of the morning. For it is rather nice. As the little two year declared "its not raining"!

I feel very satisfied having just made the kitchen sparkly clean. I shall not think about the fact that dinner prep is only a hour away. Later I shall tell of my cooking ventures. A dessert made with no recipe using not the proper ingredients but the one's that resided in the pantry. Tomorrow I will know how it turned out.

My list of jobs is calling. I hope to finish my organizing for collage some time in the very near future. Community Vocation Bible school is next week. I get to teach the 5 year olds. So I'm sure there will be tales to tell!

Have a splendid day watching God's goodness!

P.S.

Like the new decor? I'm still tweaking...

Finding Joy

I'm sitting down to write. Thought the kitchen is rather dirty and really should be cleaned. My school assignments need to done too. But I want to write. Simply so I can tell you what is on my mind and heart.

I got up this morning with bright prospects for they day. It didn't take long for them to fall by the wayside. I did accomplish the mowing of the lawn but even that ended in discouragement. Suddenly I'm feeling as if I'm depressing you all. Let's move on to something more joyful shall we? What is giving me that joy? Read on!

My aunty, here all the way from Africa never fails to greet me with a smile each day. And makes the best African Peanut sauce ever. Never mind I've its the first I've tasted. I'm sure it is the best!

My brothers, who make choosing the next step in life decidedly much easier. Really though do they think they can boss me around all the time?:)

Garage Sale Finds, nothing makes a person feel more smug than the great deal. I de-cluttered the house and than decorated with my new finds. Oh yes this really is mom's house but she did like it!

Substitute Sunday school teachers, my dear friend stepped up to the plate on a Saturday afternoon so I could do something that seemed so unnecessary but was the most necessary thing in the world.

Family, potlucks and family makes a splendid combination. Chatting with the cousins and seeing the uncle's and aunts visit is one of my very favorite things.

The dishes are calling and than I think some time needs to be spent with the only One who will give true joy.

Oh the Life of a Farm Girl

I've been helping out with the cattle chores of late. Apart from the fact I'm strongly tempted to feed the bovine in my pajamas I don't mind it all. Perhaps I don't look like a farm girl as another farm boy once pointed out to me many years ago, but I do my best to fill the part when necessary. With three brothers I lived the life of leisure of cooking enormous meals and washing filthy clothes. As they left it was time for me to fill their shoes. Pun attended, I never got my own coveralls and rubber boots. My brothers old one's worked fine.

I liked it best when I got to sort hogs. This may sound anomalous but I rather enjoyed sorting the fat piggy’s on their way to market. Granted I did enjoy cleaning up afterwards as well. Just a small side note, If you happen to get pig manure (i.e. poop) on your bedroom carpet do not judge the severity of the stain by smelling the pile at close range. Just ask my mom, she nearly fainted after doing so.

Another piece of advice as well if you are short in physique beware that the pigs may want to escape using any possible route including the opening between your legs. Let me put it this way when a pig runs under a short person there is simply not enough room for both. Therefore you might find yourself in the position of taking up hog riding for a living. I am still not sure how much money we lost by not getting this endeavor on video.

Though I'm not sure I always made a very good farm girl I loved being on the farm. The combine has been sold for many years now but I can still remember how much fun harvest was. Chewing on the fresh wheat kernels before enjoying an afternoon lunch. Getting those delightful suckers from the Co-op. Riding in the cab of the combine and even more fun standing on the running board. Admittedly I must say I never had the experience of having to haul the grain in the truck. Sisters and in-laws have a few stories about such experience. Trucks do have a funny way of stalling on the grain scales. But I've said too much.

Even were there the times when I had my own livestock to chore. I spent a whole winter tending to my two little piggies. Faithfully giving them water even when I had to break the ice on bitter winter days. Spending hours stuck in the feed bin because those things are terribly hard to get out of. All for $60, I thought that was appalling little compensation for all the trouble I had gone to. I decided never to repeat that entrepreneur ever again.

I fared better with the bottle calves. I didn't mind so much making the bottles and delivering morning and night. I found their noses to be quite slimy and nasty when rubbed all over me. When the milk spilled it did make me cry and have less than nice thoughts for the dear calf. I relished the fact of position as a milk maid and secretly longed for a cow to milk.

I must say that this sounds like I had an awful time on the farm. This is true. However character lessons were learned that you just can't find anywhere else. They say the farm never leaves a person. And I think it’s true. Every time I eat beef or pork I feel very smug to know its sitting on my plate and not out in the pen waiting to be fed.

Rain, Rain, Go Away

I felt that scary music and lots of tall taper candles casting spooky shadows on the walls would have completed the atmosphere last night. Kansas gave us one an outstanding thunder storm last night. The country side was fairly drenched by late evening and it was still pouring. I felt comforted by the fact that God had promised that we wouldn't be flooded again such as Noah had. With the pond overflowing its banks well over the driveway and spilling into the field and meeting up with the other pond it certainly did feel as though a boat might be needed.

Earlier in the day I had been helping host a bridal shower for a soon to be bride of a young man in our church. At one point the basement was curtained in darkness. Before the bride had even seen her gifts no less. But not before the ladies had gotten a good look at the refreshments. Thankfully the lights came on. Staying on only until the evening concert was in fall swing. Mom said the it actually sounded better without sound:)

Green leaves sit on the trees now sprinkled with rain drops. Our pond is more like a river although thankfully we have been spared having to ford across the driveway. The sun remains hidden behind the clouds and lazy little me is thankful for an excuse not to hang out laundry.

So why do I tell you about all this rain? Just because I want to share little piece of my world and send it to yours.

Oh and by the way a good book is just as good if not better being read by a single candle. Sadly it was missing the tea cups and the presence of an old maid carrying on in an English accent. Where do I get these ideas? Another story for another time.

Pieces of my Life

Life has been some what Topsy turvy of late. While some things are changing many things are staying the same yet feel oh so different. Seems like every time I start a morning routine something comes up and spoils it. Oh well one of the first things in life that should be learned is adapting to your circumstances.

My nieces and nephew are here today, some of them anyway. The first idea that sprung from their imaginations for play was to be "Africans". This uttered from the girl who always has her nose in a book.

Last week I had the delight of holding a sweet smelling baby on two separate occasions. I volunteer at the Wichita Children's Home in the Foster Care respite section. Oh its so fun, really who wouldn't want to hold a cute little boy every now and then?

I'm fixing dinner presently, the meal will be divided in two. A portion for a dear friend of mine whose husband is dyeing of cancer.
Last Wednesday also found me cooking first at home and than for a cooking class for our girls Bible study. Baking cakes was the topic, from scratch of course! Personally one of my favorite things to make. I think the class went well minus the fact that I served the cake with chocolate frosting much some mothers horror.

I had lots of fun, I really am quite fond of cooking shows and wouldn't mind doing my own YouTube series:) What do you think, would you like a little cooking show each week here? I promise you lots of mistakes and recipes that only come out of my head:)

Here are a few recipes, (I mean pictures I don't think I can write today), from the "Cooking Demo".

Very embarrassing to have a picture taken while talking:)

The cakes!

Making Your Home a Haven

Cooking is something I take a liking too, even funner than cooking is reading about other people cooking. Tammy's Recipes always seems to have delicious simple recipes and I enjoy reading them and sometimes cooking them. Yes I read about cooking and than go make up my own recipe:) Tammy is holding a weekly challenge and I decided to join in. You can read more about the the Making Your Home a Haven at Tammy's blog. Though I still live with my parents managing the house is largely my responsibility so I think I could learn a few things here. This week Tammy shared her 5 things to do in the morning. I decided to follow suit.

1. Rise by 6:30
2. Bible Time or Study
3. Exercise
4. Clean up Breakfast/ Drink Tea
5. Tidy Myself and Room

I'll be sure and let you know how it goes. Setting goals is always fun but I've heard it said "do than talk":)

I am Here

How many times this week have I been reminded who I really am. I am not the cheerful girl that appears to have it all together. No I'm not the one who eagerly serves others. My conscious is not heeded as it should. I think I can do it all myself.
I can't.
Because I'm just a poor little sheep to dumb to even follow my Shepard. Too scared to do the things I ought. Just a lowly bawling little sheep. My brain may be small and feeble but I can remember one thing.

Grace.

Grace that covered my sin.
Grace that gave me strength.
Grace that brought me here.
Grace that will lead me on.

And because of the grace that will never end I will worship the One who Died to give me that grace.

The Simple Woman's Daybook

Outside my window...
The birds are twittering from the trees that are still bare. Green grass is over taking the brown.
I am thinking...
About my grandma who hasn't been feeling the best. My mother that she wouldn't get overworked.
I am thankful for...
My family and the newness of spring.
From the learning rooms...(if this applies)
Its spring break the books are in hiding!
From the kitchen...
Leftovers from the Saturday cooking storm. Waffles, Shepard's Pie, Mexican casserole.
I am wearing...
My PJ's, getting up early hasn't been priority lately.
I am creating...
Digital scrapbook pages and notes for friends.
I am going...
To town with my mother, we shall browse the shops and than have coffee.
I am reading...
My Bible has been my sole source of comfort this past weekend.
I am hoping...
That my grandma has a good day and I that I would get to have my hair cut.
I am hearing...
Silence broken by the clicking of the keyboard and the ticking of the clock.
Around the house...
My breakfast sitting on the table waiting to be cleaned up.
One of my favorite things...
My aunty who just washed the breakfast dishes and the pile of from Sunday.

A few plans for the rest of the week:

Making a green meal for St. Patrick's day and hanging out with my family.

Simple Woman's Daybook

Gone North and Back Again

I'm back from the land of South Dakota! The trip was pure delight even driving in the very flat fields of NE however the glorious rolling hills in SD and even mountains made up for it. As pretty as it was the bright array of colors that met us in KS as the sun set made me feel so glad to be home.

We had some good farmer boys for drivers. They got my daddy's little girl safely home while facing dangerous ice and snow and utterly boring stretches of roads.



I had to take a picture to see how I looked before we arrived:) Vain wasn't I? Perhaps it would have been better if I didn't know the whole story.

One of the very fun moments of the trip was waking up snow! Imagine there is even real hills there to go sledding on, a real novelty for us Kansans. However they would have to be passed up for we were homeward bound.


The blurry sunset. I knew I was back in the land I love.

So Long Farewell...

Well I'm running away for the weekend to Hot Springs SD! I'm so excited to spend 10 hours+ in the car with friends and then spending more time with a friend when we get there!

However the cold temps and snow aren't drawing me right now. Its so lovely here in KS as of now, warm and delicious like apple pie.

I've spent today cleaning house and packing. For Christmas I got a snazzy new suitcase with very snazzy wheels. And I'm just now getting to use if for the first time. I must say its pretty impressive, a real tiny little thing yet holds everything to make a girl beautiful (yes I know a lot), clothes, boots, coat and a few other things. I'm glad for the wheels because I'm not sure I can carry it:)

So you won't be hearing for me till sometime next week. I do hope to show you some pictures of the Black Hills, which I've never seen before. Exciting things!

Photo Caption: Bethanne next the Sioux Falls in Sioux Fall SD the last time she was in SD, 3 1/2 years ago. This time she will be on the other side of SD:)

No Excuse

Please forgive me won't you? Let's just say I've been neglecting my little blog but no more. My head is filled with ideas and I intend to share them all with you. So don't leave me yet!

I have question for anybody who would like to answer. If I could I'd give everyone who answered a piece of Hersey's Special Dark Chocolate. Just to sweeten the deal a little.

I know I'm good.

But I digress.

Would you all like to hear more about me? As in what I do on a day to day basis. You know cleaning toilets, changing diapers, and driving around in my really hot car. Not.

So I will let the jury commence and let me know with your verdict.

Thoughts from "Fireproof" coming up next week. Yes I finally got to see it!