Through the Fog

Looking at the fog covered mountain reminded me of something, my goal. Right now I sometimes feel like I'm living in a state of fog. Only able to know a small portion of what lies ahead. Everything else is simply black and unknown. Being at school has been different, somewhat like I've imagined and yet so very new at the same time.

Life has been very wonderful. At last I have a sister that sleeps on the other side of the room. And even more close by. Giggles and more giggles echo out of the windows late into the night. Friendly teasing make one feel very at home. Teasing may look like its disliked but on the contrary I love it. By the way did you know Ramon Noodles grow in NE? You may harvest beef or chicken.

Jesting isn't the only spirit lifter. When a person who failed their English placement test told me of their 48% score I felt ever so much better.

Feeling good can't always be. Giggles from tiny lips ring in my ears making me wish they were close by. An opportunity to just to talk with my parents is longed for. The bond that only siblings have is longed for. Moments like this make me sad to the point of tears. Then I wonder why.

Why am I here? Eleven hours away from home, possibly missing the holidays because of the awful distance. Other reasons swirl through my brain but I silence them. Right now I live in a haze of fog not knowing what will come with each new day. However I can see the top of the mountain. The triumph of finishing a school year and finishing it in God's strength. I cannot see the way through only a few steps ahead. God does so I will only follow knowing He will take me to the top.

I remember this truth and let it wash away the hurt. My family will always be missed but even they are far God is so near. Just this thought makes me smile as I proceed into another day of very fun and random collage life.

Adventures Awaiting

Life as I know is changing, unlike some changes which are temporary I know for a fact my life will never ever be the same. I’m leaving, getting kicked out of the house after toiling for years without pay. Just kidding! Packing the bags is my job and my very own idea. With uncertainty I once again I’m taking the next step in life.

After graduating in 08 the next step was certain yet so uncertain. Staying home and most likely working seemed to be a good option. Yet that was only a rough draft and many details were missing. Quickly however the Lord filled in the empty lines of my life. Two days a week and sometimes more I worked as a mother’s helper for a dear family I know. I volunteered at Source of Light ministries on Tuesday’s. An extra blessing was teaching a Release time Bible class to a group of school children every week. Grandma’s care and helping mom filled time. Other opportunities were given adding little bits of experience to my life. I loved going to the Children’s Home best. Cuddling the little babies who had received so little love was a joy. These things lended well to my character yet I knew I couldn’t do them forever. Not in this stage of life anyway. So I find myself now with a very firm plan for the next 4 months of my life.

Cornerstone Bible Institute has been in my mind for several years now. I felt immediately at home in a trip there last March. Lord willing I will be attended there this fall taking primarily Bible classes. Admittedly I must say I’m scared. Leaving my family is not going to be fun. Mom and I are very close especially during the up’s and downs of this past year. Even from a far though I can be assured of my parents prayer and love for me. Baby sitting my nieces and nephews is something I love very much and I’ll miss it but of course there will be Christmas break. Which will happen to bring a very special present by way of the stork. Yes I’m getting another niece or nephew!

My precious girl friends I’ve grown to adore very much will be missed more than I can tell. E-mail a great invention I think will be a great advocate in keeping touch.

Some days I wish I could do something else instead of going to school. Letting God down is what gives me the drive to move ahead. Nothing bad will come from forging into God’s word and seeking knowledge from Above on a deeper level. Hard times may come but is not God faithful to give us grace to persevere? Going to Bible school I’m quite sure is not all study and tears. Laughter and fellowship is something I hope to have the benefit of.

A friend of mine asked me what my goal in life was. I answered simply “to glorify God in everything I do”. And that is why I’m leaving everything I’ve ever known and jumping into something that has not yet explained its details.

This chapter of my life has a prologue. Yet the pages are blank and the very last page holds a secret, only to revealed after it’s filled with words. Adventures are waiting, exciting, scary, and very mysterious. God is by my side so I’m not anxious only thrilled to have Him always with me as I embark on this great venture.

I am Here

How many times this week have I been reminded who I really am. I am not the cheerful girl that appears to have it all together. No I'm not the one who eagerly serves others. My conscious is not heeded as it should. I think I can do it all myself.
I can't.
Because I'm just a poor little sheep to dumb to even follow my Shepard. Too scared to do the things I ought. Just a lowly bawling little sheep. My brain may be small and feeble but I can remember one thing.

Grace.

Grace that covered my sin.
Grace that gave me strength.
Grace that brought me here.
Grace that will lead me on.

And because of the grace that will never end I will worship the One who Died to give me that grace.

Desiring Marriage

Someone once told me that God gave girls a desire to want to be married and mother children. An inner longing which only be fulfilled by true love. Yet what does a girl do during those single years. Embroider things for her hope chest and dreaming all day long about her future home? Engage in a career and hope that guys will realize she has a bigger plan? The Christan girl that desperately once to get married. She knows thinking about marriage all the time is wrong but what else did God make her for? Empowered Traditionalist spoke very pointedly on this topic.

As women, this is an incredibly difficult task because we were specifically created out of man for man. However, if we trust Jesus, we can trust that He has the best for us - whether that be a life of singleness or marriage. I think it is wise to prepare to be a wife, mother, and homemaker. If we stay single, these skills will serve us and others well - our families, our communities, and any domain that God grants us ministry in. Set your heart before Him, guarding it in purity, but keeping it tender in hope.

Read the rest here.

Photo Credit: exantric

Changes

The frequent changes of backgrounds around here are rather obvious. Now there is even a new title. Hopefully these latest changes will stay firm for awhile.

Change is something I do best. I've been known to appear in 3 or 4 different outfits before going somewhere. Mom jokes that if I go missing she won't remember what I finally decided to wear:) Change is something that seems to happen in my life a lot. Sometimes very lovely and well sometimes not. One minute things are wonderful and then boom life changes. I was acutely reminded of this detail as the sun set on the New Year. A dream shattered to pieces, leaving you so mangled that you wonder if you ever will be fixed. Nothing is impossible with God. Gently will He clean the wounds, ever so gently will He show you His greatness and love. Suddenly the changes won't be so hard to bear.

Change and more change but not enough cash change:) This is life.

My Thoughts, Someone else's Words

I stood unmoving watching the glorious sunset. Many thoughts floated through my mind, I could write them for you here. Instead though I will direct to you another young lady that watched the same sunset. She was in another state hundreds of miles away. She is living a journey far different than mine. However we both are pressing toward the same goal, glorifying our Lord and Savior. Reflect on your own life as you read her reflections.

Election Day; The day I Knew God was in Control

My heart felt heavy as I prepared for bed. Certainly I felt that Obama would be the next president of United Sates. Not for a moment did I doubt the power of God. Yes still He could put a righteous leader in power. Sadness overwhelmed me though as I thought of the implications of having Obama as president. Would the dark speculations of people come true?
I turned to Psalm 37, the words could not be more timely for Christians in the United states. Doubt of God and His power that lies in your heart will quickly be removed. Wicked shall be overthrown and the righteous will reign. Suddenly I was filled with joy. I have an eternity to look forward to with my Lord Jesus Christ. What can a season of hardships do to me? Nothing! I knew I have a challenge. I must proclaim the word of God with my month. Telling those around me where real hope lies. Politicians will only be around for season. I may not be here all that much longer either. However my Lord Jesus Christ will always be waiting for His people to turn to Him. Such a responsibility was given to me to share that news. We are called for a much higher purpose then to whine about politics. Joy should be ours as we look toward to our eternal reward.

The LORD knows the days of the blameless,
And their inheritance will be forever. Psalms 37:18

Deep was the sleep that I was awoken out of at 2:30 am. I wondered upstairs and turned on the TV. Obama had won. Anger filled my heart as before. I had to plead forgiveness to my Lord. Later I lay in bed sleep would not visit me. Instead I prayed. I don't remember what I prayed, just that I prayed. More that ever our nation needs prayer. Thousands upon thousands voted for Obama. Prayers must be sent in those same numbers. Our new president will need them whether he thinks it or not. Pray for our new president and his family. Pray for our nation. Pray for are other leaders in authority over us. Pray for the church that they will turn to God in prayer.

O LORD, hear my prayer,
listen to my cry for mercy;
in your faithfulness and righteousness
come to my relief. Psalm 143:1

Photo Caption: Beautiful sunrise displaying God's glory the morning after election day.